23 Clear Sexual Tension Signs (What to Look For)

by April Maccario

Sexual tension occurs when you feel like something sexual should happen to help resolve the tension that’s in the air with another person. It happens when you can’t stop thinking about someone and can’t help but imagine what it’d be like to have sex with that person! 

Sometimes, you feel this way and don’t know what to do about it. Perhaps, this crush you have is on someone who is already married or taken in some way, or maybe you are the one who’s taken! 

That makes this attraction even more intense because it’s forbidden. Doesn’t it seem like we always want what we can’t have? The grass is always greener on the other side, right?

What’s hard to accept is that things wouldn’t necessarily be better if you were on the other side. You may see some good looking, intelligent businessman, but you don’t know about his drinking habits and the fact that he’s really a workaholic or something. 

Take caution when letting your hormones run the show. We’ll go over this topic in more detail now, so stay tuned for more details on sexual tension and the signs that mean you are experiencing it!

23 Top Signs of Sexual Tension

1. You are physically turned on

you are physically turned on

Have you ever felt like your body just wants to have sexual intercourse with someone? Do you have aching loins? Yeah, that’s your body trying to tell you something! Often, when two people feel this way, they have raging hormones going on! In other words, their hotness for each other is off the charts!

2. You have heard that people are talking

Have you heard that song, Let’s Give Them Something to Talk About? “People are talking…” is one of the lines that comes to my mind when I think of what others are saying behind my back when I have sexual tension going on with a person. Maybe people are asking why the two of you aren’t already together. 

That can make things a bit awkward if the answer is that he hasn’t asked yet! However, if those people are saying the same thing to him, maybe it will motivate him to ask you out. On the other hand, if this is pointed out to you when you shouldn’t be feeling this way about a person, it may be a clue to be a little more subtle with your actions and such.

3. You get butterflies in your stomach when he’s around

This is a real phenomenon of sexual tension. He just brings the nervous tummy sensation out when he is around you. It’s his fault, right? You can’t help what’s going on with you physically!!

4. You can’t help but check him out

A “once over” isn’t enough with this guy. You check him out at least twice a day!

5. You sit next to him any chance you can

Maybe you make excuses to be near him. Hey! You just want to innocently hear what he says, right? It’s more likely that you just want to be closer to him to get to know him better, to have more opportunities to flirt, and to let him hear more about you!

6. You desperately wonder what it’d be like to kiss him

You can’t help it because he’s hot and has those luscious lips that you just wonder what it’d be like to have them touching yours! This is a normal sign of sexual tension!

7. Your conversations get awkward

Yikes! Don’t you hate it when this happens? It probably happens more than you’d like to admit if you are having sexual tension with a person. The next time you talk to this guy, see if the conversation goes a weird route, and watch how he handles the awkwardness.

8. You make eye contact more than usual

Eye contact is a strong indicator that there’s more going on beneath the surface! If you can’t keep your eyes off him, you are probably experiencing some sexual tension.

9. You hug each other a lot

Touch is a powerful thing, and hugging is just about the closest you can get with a person without going in a romantic direction. You and/or he probably enjoys feeling the body of the other person against yours/his. Prolonged hugs are especially powerful.

10. You find yourself daydreaming about him

Do you get lost in your thoughts of him? Yeah, you definitely have something going on underneath the surface!

11. You naturally find yourself in close proximity to him

This may happen subconsciously, but if you notice your desks inch closer to each other for no apparent reason, there may be something going on with you two!

12. You flirt with one another

you flirt with one another

Usually, if someone is invested in you and wants to have something more happen, he’ll flirt with you in a way that shows his feelings so that he can discover if you feel the same about him. This could happen the other way around, too!

13. You have lingering touches

Have you found that he touches you for longer than usual times? He probably is trying to show you he has a thing for you by doing this!

14. You smile when he’s around

Maybe your mouth moves in the direction of a smile even on your bad days - just because he’s around!

15. You stare at him

You may find it hard to look away when he’s in the room. The clothes he wears, his baby blue eyes, and pouty lips are just all too much!! You desperately want him with every ounce of your body!

16. Your voice changes when you talk to him

This is one of those weird things that happens when two people talk, and one of them wants something more and is nervous about it. Don’t you remember in those cheesy movies when the guy goes to ask out the girl (finally) and his voice cracks like a preteen going through puberty? Yeah, that really does happen when you feel nervous or anxious!

17. Your heartbeat gets faster around him

This is actually a physical response to the attraction. As Healthline explains it, your brain actually knows what kind of relationship you want with a person right away, which gives your body those physical responses. Those responses are what give you that feeling that motivates you to pursue a sexual course of action with your crush!!

18. You feel like there are always things left unsaid

You may find that you walk away from every conversation with some unanswered questions. Do you think maybe that’s because you are looking for excuses to talk to him again really soon? It’s possible that at least subconsciously, you are hoping to have a reason to be close to him again!

19. You get sweaty around him

You may have sweaty palms or just feel a bit anxious or nervous. This is a normal feeling for two people who are attracted to one another to have!

20. Your relationship feels a bit taboo

Ah, the forbidden fruit! Isn’t that the best kind, though? We know we shouldn’t be with certain people, but our bodies won’t let our brains do the thinking anymore! Instead, our body has taken over, causing us to have physical symptoms of lust!

21. Your current man says something

Oh, no! If you have found your husband or boyfriend mentioning that you talk too much about this guy or if he believes you have something going on with this guy, you may need to reassess the relationship you have with your crush! If you have sexual tension that your man sees, that’s a sign that you’ve let things go a little too far!

22. You have had wet dreams about this guy

Yikes! Yes, this happens when you have a hot crush on someone! It’s your body’s way of saying that you aren’t sexually fulfilled in your current state.

23. You pay attention when he talks

You may find it difficult to multitask when he talks to you because you are engrossed with every word that comes out of his mouth!

If You Should Not Be Feeling Sexual Tension

1. You are taken

I know it’s hard, but you need to be honest with the person you are with if you think that your crush is the person you are meant to be with. No one wants to be cheated on, so be fair and end things with the person you are with if you think this sexual tension means something real. If you are bored in your current relationship, maybe the two of you could work things out still.

If you have no intention of being with this person you have a crush on, you should maintain your distance as much as you can from your crush. Remember that you are in a committed relationship, and you don’t want to hurt the guy you’re with, especially if your crush is just a phase that means nothing. You don’t have to confess anything; just stop the flirty behavior.

2. He is taken

he is taken

So, you’re attracted to someone who’s involved with another individual in some way? The last thing that you want is to come between two people and break them up, especially if you aren’t even sure that this person is the one you are supposed to be with. Think about it; how well do you even know him? Don’t mess with the relationship of other people. 

If you think the sexual tension is out of control and needs to be addressed, be open and honest with the person, letting him know how you feel and what you hope to do to resolve the issue (hint: back off and keep your distance). Make sure he knows that you aren’t backing off because of something he did; you just don’t want to come between two people involved with one another.

3. Other reasons

Maybe your work doesn’t allow you to date coworkers or something. If this is the case, it’s hard, if not impossible, to not be fueled by this taboo relationship! When someone tells you that you can’t do something, doesn’t that turn it into the one thing you want to do the most? Ah! I know! It’s a tough situation to be in, but do you really want to be fired for making inappropriate actions?

Watch for the signs of sexual tension, such as prolonged eye contact and other body language cues. If you notice the sexual chemistry is super hot, you may need to take a step back and reassess the way you are approaching the relationship with this person. Find ways to reduce the sexual tension floating around and try to reduce the signs of sexual chemistry happening.

If You Have A Future

If you are ready to take this relationship to the next person, make sure, he feels the same way. Does he express the body language of someone who feels the same sexual tension that you do? If that’s the case, you may want to just see where things go from here; will the sexual tension develop into something more? Will he continue to show you the signs over time?

If you feel strongly that he feels the way you do, send him the signals that you are ready to take the relationship to the next level. Find out if he is, indeed, single, available, and looking for a relationship. Then, continue to show him the signs of sexual tension, such as flirting, making eye contact, checking him out, and giving him prolonged touches. He’ll get the hint!

FAQs

What does sexual tension feel like?

You may feel a faster heart rate if you check your pulse. You may actually feel awful and amazing at the same time! It can be a rather rough thing to go through because your brain is driving the physical response that is making you feel this way.

What causes sexual tension?

When you are craving sex, tension may arise. Your hormones may be raging, and your body may be going wild, trying to keep up with what your brain is telling it to do. Your brain knows what you want, and your body is trying to keep up!

Can you feel sexual energy from someone?

Definitely! When you feel a sense of attraction to someone, your body responds accordingly. It wants to do what your brain is signaling it to do, causing your body to do all sorts of things! Your heart may race; you may get sweaty and feel butterflies in your tummy!

How do you know if there's sexual tension between someone else?

If you’re feeling sexual tension, you will know it by the way your body makes you feel, but for someone else, you may have to carefully look for the right signs. Does he stare back at you, or does he touch you longer than a person should? Is flirting involved?

What is an unspoken attraction?

Unspoken attraction means that you feel attracted to someone but don’t vocalize your feelings. You don’t actually say to anyone out loud how you are feeling inside. You may be doing this because that person is taken or you are! There may be something secretive going on.

To Sum Things Up…

What are some signs of sexual tension that you know of? Are you battling sexual tension with someone right now? What did you think of my list? I’d love it if you shared your response in the comments section and pass this along to someone else who may like it!

April Maccario
I'm a huge nerd when it comes to understanding how relationships between men and women work, and what drives a certain behavior. I spend much of my time getting into the nitty-gritty and try to share my findings on this site with the hope of making life a little easier for women that are struggling in their relationships or love life.

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