Your sex life can still be wild and exciting whilst you’re pregnant, but once you actually give birth you’ll not only be aware of the fact you’re going to have to hold off having sex for a while, but you may also not be mentally prepared for a lot longer than you anticipated.
After you give birth, it is recommended that you don’t engage in penetrative sex for anywhere between four and six weeks. This is because your body is healing itself and it needs time to go back to normal (well, a new normal).
Some people may claim they have sex before the four-week mark, but doing so can be dangerous and it may increase the likelihood of complications such as urine infections or hemorrhages.
To be on the safe side, most couples like to wait at least six weeks, if not longer, to have sex after the baby arrives. So, it’s vital that you follow the advice about after birth sex that the healthcare professionals taking you through the postpartum stage tell you.
However, it’s only natural that you will still want to take care of the sexual needs your man has and keeping your sex life on track, as well as taking care of your new baby - women really do it all!
If you’re concerned about pleasing your man or you’ve got a mental block of the ways you can pleasure him without having penetrative sex, don’t panic. We’re going to share seven of the best things you can do to see that your sexual connection with your partner stays alive after having a new baby.
There’s something both incredibly romantic and sexual about giving your partner a massage, or the two of you massaging each other. If your body is still feeling a bit sore post pregnancy and birth it’s probably unlikely that you want to be touched, but you can enjoy the massage by pleasuring your man.
Grab a massage oil with a sultry scent, light some candles, and invite your man into the bedroom for some relaxing fun. Depending on how much time you have and how you’re feeling, you can massage his entire body with him naked, or just part. See how excited he gets - he’ll definitely take pleasure from enjoying a happy ending!
Of course, if you’re in a situation where you still can’t have penetrative sex with your man, you’re going to have to go back to foreplay. The truth is, we often forget about foreplay, and reaching climaxes from sex takes priority, but foreplay deserves a lot more airtime.
So, get busy with your hands, and surprise your man every so often by putting your hands straight down his pants. He’ll not only like the fact you want to pleasure him, but he’ll be even more turned on about spontaneity.
Although nothing sexual actually has to happen, enjoying a bubble bath together is something that can really deepen the intimate connection between you and your partner.
Of course, you’ll most likely be extremely busy with diapers and breastfeeding, but if you can spare some time, regardless of the time of day, run a bubble bath and get all soapy with your love.
It’s not all about having sex after the baby falls asleep for a while, in fact, you may both be so exhausted that’s the last thing on your mind, even when you can physically do it. Instead, you can give pleasure to your partner and receive pleasure by doing something together that relaxes you both and deepens the intimate bond you share.
Your partner will definitely appreciate it if you give him a blowjob because let us be honest, oral sex is amazing and pretty much everyone enjoys it. Due to the fact you may not yet be able to have penetrative sex with your partner, you can emulate the sensation of having sex for him by using your mouth.
It will feel incredible for him, especially when he hasn’t been inside you for such a long time. To make it extra sexy, take him by surprise or wake him up in a morning by doing this.
You may overlook kissing and think that it’s just a precursor to sex, but do you remember a time when kissing got you all hot and bothered? You can feel like that again, and so can your man.
You can easily please your man by passionately kissing him every so often. The next time you go to kiss him goodnight, deepen the kiss, push your tongue gently into his, and grasp his face in your hands.
A passionate kiss like this will ensure your man feels satisfied, but if he’s begging for more, that’s the perfect time to try out points 2 or 4 above. As well as your man being satisfied, you will also enjoy making out with your love, especially when you can’t make love to him right now, so there’s something in it for you too.
A great way for couples to bond on an intimate level when they can’t have sex is by either reading an erotic novel or watching an erotic film together. You can find a selection of erotic novels online if popping to the bookstore isn’t really your thing, and you can read to each other on a night.
If you prefer, there’s also a selection of erotic podcasts and audiobooks available, so you can listen rather than reading.
In addition, there are so many new movies out there that are about sex or that have erotic sex scenes. Reading, listening, or watching erotica together will make you both feel turned on, and could lead to the two of you getting hot and steamy, or getting some exciting ideas for when you get back to having sex.
Although you may not be able to have sex right now, you can ensure your man is satisfied by talking dirty to him and getting him ready and excited for what’s to come when your body is ready to make love to him. Get him excited and longing for your first sexual encounter.
You may feel overly tired and less than yourself after having a baby, but your partner will still be attracted to you, so don’t worry too much. If you want to attract him even more, however, follow the seven tips that are listed above. In addition, if you feel comfortable enough to, ditch the sweats every so often for a floaty dress.
As mentioned above, it’s typically advised to wait four to six weeks before having penetrative sex after birth, but there are plenty of things you can do instead, although truthfully most of the things you can do will only benefit your partner. All of the points above are things you can sexually to your partner, and with yourself, you can try and touch around (not inside) your vulva, although it will most likely be painful for a while.
Yes, you can definitely orgasm after having a new baby. However, the first time or the first few times you may not. Your body has changed so much, you need to get to know yourself again and it takes time to adjust. Make sure not to pressure yourself into orgasm, rather, just enjoy the feeling of your new body post-pregnancy.
There are so many ways that you can impress your man in bed at night, whether when you’re not pregnant, post-pregnancy, or during pregnancy. You can try role play, live out sexual fantasies, use sex toys, or even just try new positions. One of the most important things that couples forget about all the time is moving slowly in the bedroom. Make the most of sexual experiences with your partner, even if you have to rush and try to sex after the baby goes down for a quick nap.
Typically no, couples don’t fight more after having a baby. The bond created in pregnancy and through childbirth will actually create a deeper bond between the pair. However, they may bicker more or get more agitated within themselves in the first few months because they will be so tired, stressed, and will have had no downtime just the two of them.
Hopefully, this article has helped open your eyes to some things you can try with your partner to ensure you’re keeping the connection between the two of you as intimate as possible.
Just remember, your partner loves you and cares for you, so there’s no need to rush into having sex until both your mind and body are ready for it. You just brought a life into the world, so your partner will understand if you want to hold off for a while to get jiggy with him post-pregnancy.
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