20 Promising Signs He Wants You To Be His Girlfriend 

by April Maccario

You met James last year, during spring break, and over the year you've fallen deeply in love with him. You always wish to spend time with James, no matter how short, and sometimes, you can tell he loves spending time with you too. 

Despite his somewhat visible feelings, you're still having a tough time knowing what exactly his dating intentions are and you ask yourself “Is he being the normal, friendly James, or does he want to be with me?” Those surprise cupcakes in the middle of the week tell you one story, while his smile at Mandy last week looks precisely like the one he gives you on a regular day. You're confused, and it's justified; this is a serious matter of the heart.

I know where you're coming from, and it's understandable in more ways than one. I've had my fair share of James, some of which I let go because of uncertainty, and others that turned out to be great partners. 

Does he want you to be his girlfriend? Does he want me? are common questions we all ask when we meet guys that make our hearts melt with a single smile. In this article, I spill all the tea on how to tell what a guy wants from you and the sure signs he exhibits, which means he wants you in his life as a girlfriend.

What Are The Signs He Wants You To Be His Girlfriend?

1. Opinions about him matter a lot

Here, we talk about the opinions of those you care about. It could be your parents or friends, but these opinions will mean a lot to someone who sees a future with you. When a man wants to make a woman his, he respects her and her support system, which may be her family or friends. In as much as their opinions matter a lot, he will get nervous about meeting them

He might even ask for feedback on his behavior during their meeting, simply because he wants to make a good impression. On the other hand, a guy who doesn't care about their approval simply doesn't like you that much.

2. You know his family members

And this doesn't only mean you've met them in passing. A guy who loves and wants a relationship with you will make sure to introduce you to his friends, parents, and family. After the introduction, he will do everything possible to ensure that you spend time with them, no matter how short.

This is simply because he's bringing you, slowly into his inner circle, to ensure you know everyone who means just as you do to him. He will be dating you soon, thus, wants them to like you, just as much as he wants you to like them.

3. You both have regular plans

It could be Sunday brunch, or a regular weekend walk in the park together. You have possibly set a weekly date night where you watch movies with popcorn and wine. Having regular plans with a man is one of the most pressing signs that he wants you to be his girlfriend.

So, if he weren't that interested, he'd spend less, sporadic time with you mainly because he has other options waiting around the door. Hence why having regular plans sets the tone for a potential relationship or a long term commitment; thus, it shouldn't be taken as just one of those things.

4. He will get transparent with you

James is extremely honest with you; you’ve never come across another guy that open and vulnerable with you. He talks about the future freely, makes his dreams verbal, and is never afraid to tell you how much you mean to him. A man who doesn't speak candidly with you might be keeping his guard up, for fear of being overly vulnerable, only to be disappointed.

He Will Get Transparent With You

In another vein, it could only be he's not as interested and doesn't want a relationship with you. It is best to look at all the possible reasons for transparency or lack thereof, alongside the rest of the signs in our article.

5. His actions say everything

Saying you like someone is straightforward; the three words don’t cost much and can be shouted from the rooftop in a single breath, without any attached meaning. The hardest thing to do, however, is to show someone just how much they mean to you and how much you love them. 

If his actions get along with the three-word sentence, trust that he sees you as more than a friend. Showing actions is very different from telling someone you want a relationship with them. It displays exactly where a man stands when it comes to you, from the way he looks at you to how he treats you when you’re around. 

6. He hates playing games with you

Let me tell you other signs that show whether a guy wants you as his girlfriend or not. If he wants a relationship with you, he will never try playing games with you (or your head). Yes, he's never going to drive you crazy, tricking you into doing things you don't want to do. A guy who manipulates you simply wants to be with you because, for him, you're an easy tool.

A man who cares about your feelings and respects you as an independent person who can’t be coaxed, he will never try to impose himself on you in any way. A guy who doesn’t play games with you is a real man, who faces his problems squarely instead of hiding behind manipulations. 

7. He’s your protector

One of the signs that tell you without a doubt he wants you to be his girlfriend Is when he has a natural urge to protect you and your needs. A man who cares about you will do this because he wants to make sure nothing wrong happens to you, so he's usually there for you more often than not. 

This doesn't mean he's still stalking you, staying two meters away to ensure that you're safe every second. Protecting you means he can sense if you're feeling threatened by a situation, and steps in to help you handle it easily.

8. He makes you his priority

For a majority of the time, you come first in the life of a man who wants to be with you long term. This may not be all the time because being first all the time isn’t naturally possible; however, even though some things may come before you, you will still know how important you are to him. 

When a man wants to be with you, it doesn't mean he has to abandon everything else in his life to be with you 24/7. That's simply madness; a madness you will get tired of quickly. Being his priority means that your wants and needs matter to him as much as they do to you.

9. He talks about a future with you openly

James is always going on about all the things you could do together in the future. For a guy who cares about you, it is natural that his vision of the future includes you. In talking about plans with you, he may create concrete scenarios and not dreamy, movie-like pictures of you leaving everything behind to travel the world.

When a man sees you in his future, he'll talk about scenarios like moving in with each other, or getting a new place altogether. He might even go more in-depth, talking about work and career options that work well for both of you.

10. He regularly keeps in touch

If something comes up, no matter how minute, James is sure to let you know, it might be he's running late for your regular Friday night movie date, or he burnt his favorite shirt while rushing to work. A man who cares and sees you in his future doesn't simply disappear on you, and then comes back pretending as though everything and everyone is okay.

If he stays in contact, it means he's factored in your feelings, and since he respects, you see the need to keep you in the loop.

11. He compliments you often

There's no significant reward for passing an honest compliment; thus, a man stands to lose nothing giving you one. When a man sincerely compliments you, it might be because he's interested in you and wants to build that close connection with you. 

Compliments are only physical; they can be about your accomplishments, intelligence, and even your personal preferences. If a man always complements you about your physical looks, it might be signs he doesn’t want a relationship with you and is only interested in sex.

12. His past is made public to you

Not public in the sense that he shouts about his last love life from across the street. He becomes open about his past (including his love life) to you because he wants to let you into his life. One way to get someone you care about into your life is to tell them about the things that make you vulnerable. It shows your level of care and trust in the other person, and how prepared you are to take what you have a step further. 

13. You spend lots of time together

People tend to get closer when they spend more time together. It's possible that when you became friends with James, you saw him about once a week. Now, as the friendship has evolved, you see yourselves up to five times a week, always meeting up for one thing or the other. It might even be more serious, where you spend the night at each other's place over the weekends. 

You spend lots of time together

This is one of the clear cut signs he wants you to be his girlfriend and as such, you may start dating soon. Spending time with someone makes the bond and intimacy stronger, helping you know them better in the process.

14. He's happy when you're happy

Yes, happiness can be contagious, and it becomes evident when you're dating someone. For someone who wishes to be with another person for a long time, there's a high desire to go out of your way to keep them happy. What’s more, any man who wants you to be his girlfriend will pay attention to your needs and wants and try his possible best to keep you happy by giving them to you. 

It is, however, important to note that your happiness isn't going to be his responsibility; it's yours. No matter how willing a man is to make your joy, his job, it isn't his full-time job. That's all on you, sweetheart.

15. You have inside jokes

James does this a lot! He's always teasing you about one thing or the other when you're with friends. The best part is that the jokes aren't understood by anybody present apart from you. This is going to create a silent but strong bond between the two of you and also signifies that he loves having something special and unique with you. Using inside jokes is a sign that he wants to be more than a friend to you, but he might be too shy or afraid to voice out his desire of dating you.

16. He never makes and breaks a promise

It’s been an extremely tiring day at his office, but he’s with you, standing patiently waiting in line while you itch to watch the latest rom-com. He looks sleepy, tired even, but he didn't stand you up. That's one of the sure signs he wants you to be his girlfriend.

A man who keeps his promises to a woman is one who respects her and cares about her feelings. Since your happiness is his happiness, he'll do everything he possibly can never to disappoint you.

17. He stays over regularly

One sign to know whether you’re on your way to a love life is when you stay the night together. Any man who doesn’t see themselves in a relationship with you is always in a hurry to say goodbye in the morning, even when you both know he doesn’t have a hectic morning or an early day. Staying the night sets the tone for being non-sexually intimate, and this can be a turn off for a guy who’s not that interested in you. 

18. He states the need for exclusivity

James wants to be exclusive, and he doesn't beat around the bush with his request. He is very vocal, telling you how he feels and how much he wants to be exclusive as a couple with yours indeed. Being this frank says exactly where he stands, and where you stand with him. It may take a while, but it's done such that things aren't left open to misinterpretation.

19. He goes deep

Your potential relationship partner can spend hours with you, just talking. He loves asking questions about you and makes sure he can know everything about you. Not only does he ask, but he is always ready to listen, and might even remember details you thought he'd overlook. Discovering you are an adventure for him, and he takes it on entirely with glee and excitement.

20. He asks your friends

He goes deep

...Or he tells them how he feels about you, and what he wishes for. Some guys may not talk to you directly about how they think, but they might express themselves to those who know you, in a bid to be clear about how you feel. Such a situation is hard to decipher unless, of course, your friend knows about your feelings and wants to help your heart take a break from the constant worrying session.  

FAQs 

How long until he asks me to be his girlfriend?

If you want to know whether or not you're attracted to someone, a few months is a rather short period to be sure. It takes time to grow with another person in a relationship; thus, you shouldn't rush to conclude. At most, 12 months is enough time to know if a man is interested in you. If he hasn't addressed you as his girlfriend to others or even to you, there's a high chance he's not that interested in you.

How do you know if a man is serious about you?

Knowing your position in your man's life is essential, as it enables you to see where the relationship stands and where it's headed. To tell if someone you love is serious about you, you need to study their behavior and the way they behave with you. If he listens and welcomes your opinions, assures you that you're his priority, and is open with you, it is a sign he might just be earnest about you.

What does it mean if he asks you to be his girlfriend?

If a man asks you to be his girlfriend or his significant other, it merely means you're both in an exclusive relationship, and he's not making any other person his special friend or partner. The process of asking you to be his girlfriend shows that he's thought about the pros and cons, and has decided to be in a committed relationship with you and no one else.

How do you make him ask you to be his girlfriend?

You look into his eyes, and you can tell there's some affection for you. Despite this, he may not seem to want to make a move towards you, and frankly, you’re sick of waiting. It is best to start spending some one-on-one time with this guy you're in love with and show a sign or two about your interest in him. Flirt a little to keep yourself out of the friend zone, but avoid showing too much affection as this can push him away.  

How do you tell if he sees a future with you?

Indeed, we all don't know what the future holds, but there's a way to tell if a guy sees himself with you in his future, no matter what it might contain. Guys with the future in mind don't have an issue with showing you to family, introducing you as his significant other. 

They also speak with you in the plural sense about the future, using 'we' based sentences and not 'I.' Lastly, he asks you about your plans, genuinely because he wants to know how best you both can make the future work in your favor.

To Summarize

I hope that by the end of this article, you no longer see the need to wonder about whether or not he’s serious about you. Be mindful that every guy asks himself some questions before asking a girl they care about to be their dating partner. The primary question is whether or not this is the girl they want to commit to for the long term. Answering this question determines their next move and everything else, including their actions towards you. 

I hope you like this article; if so, get it over to friends and other sisters in the same boat as you, to help them see the way forward with the guy they love.  

April Maccario
I'm a huge nerd when it comes to understanding how relationships between men and women work, and what drives a certain behavior. I spend much of my time getting into the nitty-gritty and try to share my findings on this site with the hope of making life a little easier for women that are struggling in their relationships or love life.

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