11 Signs He Wants To Marry You

by April Maccario

It is quite unfortunate that dating a guy long-term is no guarantee that he sees himself starting a family with you. In fact, in the long run, less than 30% of couples end up getting married. However, as many time wasters as are out there, just as many people date to build something that lasts.

How then do you tell them apart? After all, some people act right and are still not interested in marriage. Well, some subtle signs give a man’s intention of marrying you away long before he even starts shopping for a ring. These signs he wants to marry you are more predictable depending on the guy, and the nature of your relationship.

Before I share, I would like to issue a fair warning that seeing only one or two of these signs doesn’t necessarily mean he wants to get married. Some people don’t even believe in marriage, but those are not the ones we are here for today.

Now, not to drag this out any further, let’s get right to the signs he wants to marry you.

11 Signs He Wants To Marry You 

1. He says “I want to marry you”

He says “I want to marry you”

Starting with the most obvious of signs, when he expresses his intention of marrying you clearly, without being asked, you may feel like he isn’t being serious, probably because it hasn’t been that long since you started going out, but men know what they want. Most of them know better than to broach the marriage subject when they don’t mean it.

Not to dismiss the manipulative types, like one of my exes, that lie unprovoked though, some guys can say things like this with zero intention of following through. This is why you have to consider everything as a whole. Don’t just listen to the words coming out of his mouth, make sure you study his behavior as well, especially if the relationship is relatively new.

If he’s just a smooth talker, his actions will give him away with time. However, if you still can’t tell for sure, trust your instincts and watch out for other signs before putting all your eggs in his basket.

2. He loops you into his future plans and is interested in yours

Someone who is only having fun with you has no business telling you what he plans to do five or ten years down the line, you wouldn’t even hear about any personal or collective life goals.  Be it plans to move to another city or quit his job to start a business, he won’t bring it up if he doesn’t intend to hang around for long.  

Sure, it may not mean much if it comes up in conversation, and he carries it from there, but, if he broaches the subject intentionally more than once, it may be because he’s trying to see your reaction to it because it matters to him. This is a good sign he actually wants to move the relationship to the next level, and hopefully, start a family with you.

Even more, as he is discussing his plans, he wants to know yours too. A man who wants to marry you will not only be interested in what you do right now but also what you intend to do. So, if he has made your progress his priority, that is one of the signs you seek.

3. He lets you in his personal space

It isn’t until a man asks to move in together before you know he wants to marry you, although that is also a tell-tale sign. Notice how he acts when you ‘encroach’ on his personal space, and compare it with that ex who always gives you grief for sleeping over.

There is a certain peace that comes with being with this guy that you get over or explain. He makes you feel at home with him on a level that transcends physical space. Even if he ordinarily prefers to withdraw into his man cave, your presence in it feels more natural, rather than an invasion of privacy.

And when you both finally take the big step to do life together, like renting an apartment or carpooling, it will be beyond logical reasons saving costs. You will know it’s because he wants you to be the person he wakes up to every morning and kisses goodbye at night until the moment you officially become his wife.

4. He values your counsel

When he doesn’t make any major life decisions without seeking your opinion, you know that man means business with you. Men are known to keep to themselves a lot more than women, but even those who clam up the most have one person they like to confide in. In some cases, it’s a best friend, in many more, it’s their significant other.

If your man has found those two people in you, that level of trust isn’t very far from marriage. And this goes beyond giving you the gist about a co-worker who annoyed him, his encounter with a crazy driver in traffic, or any other general thing.

The relationship might seem like it’s going normally, but if you notice he starts including you in his plans more often than not, maybe he is gearing up to make that important life decision. He could choose to get you involved in furnishing a new house, picking out a new tie, or asking you trivial questions about life in general, at this point, he probably already sees you as family. 

5. He refers to you as a team

He refers to you as a team

Another way to tell if he wants to put a ring on it is if he incorporates you into things that could have passed without. When a man wants to take the relationship to the next level, you’ll notice he stops using ‘I’ and starts using ‘us’ or ‘we.’ even when he’s talking to his family or friends about you, he’ll keep saying, “we decided” that’s definitely a good sign. 

It shows he already sees you two as a team, not just a couple for now. He could easily talk about that great place you guys went to last year without saying “we really enjoyed our time there.” Even better when he says it in your absence too, that tells you it’s probably become a habit for him at this point, and not just something he does to make you feel important.

This kind of commitment can be displayed anywhere from organized functions where he has to give a speech, like an award ceremony, to random conversations with friends.

6. He invites you to every function

Whether it’s his work functions or family occasions, if he asks you to go with him to his events, it’s his way of letting you know he isn’t afraid to show you off to the people closest to him.

One of the most glaring signs that a man is really into you is when he takes every chance he gets to acquaint you with his friends and family. He’ll get an invitation for two instead of just going to parties or functions on his own. While some guys do this with any hot girl they have a casual relationship with, I can tell you they are the exception, not the rule.

A guy who wants to marry you wants to share all the significant happenings in his life with you, including both the glamorous and the less positive ones. So, if he wants you to be with him on holidays, and also invites you when his favorite uncle dies, that right there is among the most common signs he wants to marry you. He wouldn’t put his relatives in a position to get that close to you otherwise.

7. Nothing about him is off-limits to you

Most girls have that over-sized sweatshirt that wasn’t bought by them in mind right now, and while yours might belong to your boyfriend, a guy letting you keep his shirt does not necessarily mean he plans to start a family with you someday. Except, of course, it holds high sentimental value to him and would only release it to his life partner.

If he can’t get you off his mind, acts like he doesn’t want you to leave whenever your around, he probably thinks of you as his life partner. At this point in the relationship, you probably completely own his heart, his physical space is like yours, he doesn’t shut you out emotionally, and freely shares things considered personal with you. 

No conversation should be off-limits with the person you intend to spend the rest of your life with. Unless it is something traumatic he isn’t ready to go back to yet, let alone share with anyone. If he opens up to you on difficult subjects and awkward pasts and makes you feel comfortable enough to share yours, maybe he does want you guys to start sharing everything, because he is thinking along the lines of marriage. 

8. He discusses his finances with you

A lot of breaks in friendships can be traced back to money, in fact, it is right behind infidelity in the leading causes of divorce, according to Dave Ramsey. It does just as much harm in dating as well, not only in marriage. Not to generalize, but many relationships end because one party would rather break up with the person they are seeing than let them into their finances. 

Those are the types who end up splitting over money if they manage to stay together long enough to marry.  Color me naïve, but there is no shame in being open with money with the person you plan to become one with, at some point. 

Plus, t’s not just me; I believe a lot of people share this view, in addition to his emotional investment, if your boyfriend shares this controversial aspect with you, he not only intends to wed you someday but is also laying the foundation for a transparent, happy marriage and family life.

9. He doesn’t act awkward when marriage comes up

Whether you two pass by a ring store or watch a beautiful wedding scene together, you can tell if a man is (not) interested in getting married by how he reacts. If he cringes or tries to hurry things along, he probably won’t be donning the tux anytime soon, and if he plans to, it’s not with you.

The one who wants to be your future husband will not only encourage conversations about marriage; you’d hear the anticipation in his tone when he does. “I can’t wait for the day you officially become mine,” “There’s no way we are doing that on our wedding day.” It might be something you both laugh off at that moment, but they say that the mouth speaks out of the abundance of the heart.

Also, these kind of ‘jokes’ are usually not a one-time thing, and sometimes, they aren’t even said lightly. It may come out during intimate sessions, or just after settling a fight. If you notice this particular sign, it is a good one.  

10. You have a pet together

You have a pet together

You love dogs, and so does he, so you didn’t think much of it when he asked if you want to get one together. Yours may not be a furry canine, it could be any other animal you both love, what matters is the intention behind that gesture. 

He could have gotten a pet by himself, but doing it together makes it one more thing you share. Even more, getting a pet together sounds like the kind of commitment someone who is in it for the long haul would show.

If you have talked about having kids someday and you know he wants that as well, that might be him trying to get in some parenting practice before your own little ones eventually come.

11. He seems more excited lately

Finally, signs that he wants to marry you can easily mean something else, and this one is no different. If you’ve been in a relationship for a while, it is highly likely that you’ve been through some highs and lows together. The thrill of your earlier days together has probably reduced as you each got used to one another, that’s completely normal.

Now that you are likely past the butterfly phase, you probably still plan your days around each other and spend a lot of your free time together. However, that urgency of literally not being able to get enough of you, is not what it used to be. So, if he lights up when you come around, gets touchier or more expressive about his feelings than usual, he is probably very close to popping the big question. 

FAQs

How long does it take a man to know he wants to marry you?

Some married men swear they knew from the beginning of the relationship that their partner was the one. Guys may want to take things slow before finally deciding to settle down, it may take 6 months or even more time, but they say they knew from the start. However, science puts a time frame of 172 days on it, so it must be right. 

What does it mean when a guy wants to marry you?

It means he wants you to be the one he spends the most important parts of his life with. When a guy says he wants to marry you, he’s saying that he wants you to become his wife and likely the mother of his children. 

How do you know if a man is married or not?

The easiest way to tell would be to check if he’s wearing a wedding ring or has a dent on his finger where the ring should be. Unfortunately, he can easily cover those tracks, nonetheless, if he won’t ever let you come to his place, gives you specific calling hours, or shows any signs on this list, he may be married.

How soon do you know he’s the one?

On average, research says it takes about seven months for an American to know if their partner is the one. I think it depends on what that means to you. If it’s all physical, you can probably tell the first time you guys meet, but it might take longer if your criteria
run a little deeper.  

How do you know you want to marry someone?

If the person you are with possesses all the qualities you want in a spouse, you may feel the need to marry them. These qualities mean several things to different people, but basically, it means that they hold the same values as you, and you connect with them emotionally and physically.

At The End Of The Day,

If you’ve found yourself asking, “Is he thinking about marrying me,” or worrying about when he’ll get down on one knee and propose, I hope this has been helpful for you. Since asking a man out-rightly if he wants to marry you might make you come off as desperate or even scare an unsure fellow away; we have to settle for the signs he shows. 

However, if you have noticed a couple of signs he wants to marry you on my list in your man, all you can really do now is wait. In the meantime, if you like the article, you might also want to share and leave a comment, if you please.

April Maccario
I'm a huge nerd when it comes to understanding how relationships between men and women work, and what drives a certain behavior. I spend much of my time getting into the nitty-gritty and try to share my findings on this site with the hope of making life a little easier for women that are struggling in their relationships or love life.

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