Should Married Couples Take Separate Vacations? (7+ Thrilling Reasons)

by April Maccario

Taking separate vacations away from your partner seems like a bad idea - surely vacations are about making love all day, waking up late together and skinny dipping in the ocean? In fact, vacationing without your spouse has become much more common recently, and it can actually benefit your relationship. 

In this article, we’re going to take a look at the 8 reasons why separate vacations can not only help your marriage but help your own sense of self. Let’s jump right in and take a look so you can book your next solo vacation.

How Vacations Help The Relationship

1. Being apart makes you appreciate each other

There’s actually quite a lot of truth in that old, corny saying, “absence makes the heart grow fonder”. Therefore, a great reason to go away is actually so you and your partner appreciate each other more

Although spending every single day with your husband sounds romantic, that’s not normally the reality. Instead, you see each other too much to appreciate each other and instead of spending your evenings embracing each other, you fall asleep in front of the TV.

When you go away by yourself or take separate vacations at the same time, you are creating physical space between both of you and it will make you appreciate each other more.

2. Each person can spend quality time with their family or friends

Each person can spend quality time with their family or friends

It’s probably awesome that your partner comes on your yearly weekend away to the cabin with your parents and siblings, but there comes a point when you just want to spend time with your family on your own. It doesn’t mean that you love your husband any less, but it just shows that you want to reconnect with your loved ones as an individual because although no one likes to admit it, we are all a little different around our partners.

The same applies to spending time with friends. Your husband and friends might get along really well, but there comes a time when you just want to hang out with your besties, have fun, and chat with ease. You might even want to discuss your relationship with your girls, which obviously isn’t going to happen with your man around.

3. Each person can do what they take an interest in

Taking separate vacations allows you to get away and do exactly what you want. You will probably have interests in things that your partner doesn’t like, so taking a solo trip to immerse yourself into doing everything that your spouse doesn’t love as much as you do is a fantastic idea. 

As much as you love your spouse, everything has to be agreed on as a team, but during your separate vacations, you can do whatever you want. You don’t have to deal with the moaning and your partner doesn’t have to be dragged around doing things he doesn’t enjoy, and vice versa. 

4. Time alone is important

Spending time by yourself is absolutely vital. You might love your partner, but you need time apart sometimes just to check in with yourself and do whatever you want without someone else there. If both you and your partner take separate vacations, whether you want to stay in bed all day and watch films or you plan on doing an entire week of yoga, you’ll both benefit from checking in with yourselves and taking some ‘me time’.

A successful marriage comprises of two independent people that come together, and it’s essential that you realize you’re an independent person and you do need a time out from your husband, no matter how much you love him.

5. Each person becomes more independent

As amazing as marriage and having someone by your side for the rest of your life is, it also makes you part of a pair forever. So, if you can’t do something yourself you will ask your partner to do it, and you end up relying on your partner a lot more than you realize. When you take a separate vacation from your partner you become more independent again and it’s incredibly empowering.

6. You have exciting things to share with each other

When you and your spouse take separate vacations it gives the two of you things to talk about and bond over. You can share the excitement of your trip, tell all of your stories, and share photos with your husband, and he can do the same. 

It can be a really great way to bond and bring the two of you closer because it takes you back to a time when you were both independent people that spoke about everything you did separately.

7. Each person returns happier

After taking separate vacations, each of you will return happier than before, unless you’ve had an awful time, but even then you’ll be happy that you’re back! A separate vacation was probably exactly what you needed to check in with yourself, have your independent time, do all the things you enjoy that your partner doesn’t, and spend time with your loved ones.

Both you and your husband will return much happier, meaning that the relationship between the two of you is happier. 

8. Amazing reunion sex

Amazing reunion sex

We couldn’t miss this point off the list! After you’ve taken separate vacations you will both crave each other so much that you’ll probably end up ripping each other's clothes off the minute you’re reunited again. The sex after separate vacations is just as good as vacation sex, if not better.

FAQs

Is it normal for married couples to take separate vacations?

It’s completely normal for married couples to go on separate vacations. The first time you go away without your partner will feel slightly strange, especially if you’ve already been with them for a long time. However, vacationing every so often without each other is empowering, necessary, and vital for space. Marriage vacations without the kids are just as important as going away alone, so make sure you take time to do this every so often.

How long should married couples separate?

This is a completely personal question, so you’re really the only one that can answer it, unfortunately. For one couple, one or two nights of vacation apart from each other might aid the relationship significantly, but for others, it might take a month. It’s not a good idea to go over 3 months without seeing your partner though.

Is it healthy for married couples to live apart?

Surprisingly a lot of couples choose to live apart from each other, and it’s healthy as long as it works for you. Some people need physical space away from their partners to allow their relationship to truly thrive. As long it works for you, it’s healthy.

Should a couple separate to save marriage?

Separating is one of the last things you should do when trying to save a marriage - it can work but other things should be tried first. However, your marriage may benefit from one of you just taking a couple of days to vacation alone, especially if you’ve never ever been apart. 

Is it OK for a husband to go out once a week?

It’s absolutely OK for your husband to go out once a week. In fact, it’s healthy. You should both take the time to be with your friends or do something you enjoy without each other at least once a week. As long as communication is clear and you appreciate, trust, and respect each other, this is healthy for a relationship.

All In All,

Hopefully, this article has helped you to understand why it’s actually a great idea to vacation somewhere by yourself for a while. Taking time for yourself in a relationship is vital, and if it means that sitting by a pool sipping margaritas is going to help your relationship, you’ve got to take one for the team! 

Did you like this article and find it useful? If you did, let us know in the comments and feel free to share!

April Maccario
I'm a huge nerd when it comes to understanding how relationships between men and women work, and what drives a certain behavior. I spend much of my time getting into the nitty-gritty and try to share my findings on this site with the hope of making life a little easier for women that are struggling in their relationships or love life.

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