How To Pursue A Man In 10 Effective Steps

Last updated on June 16, 2022 by April Maccario

Chasing. That is the first thing on many people's minds when they come across the word 'pursue.'

Pursuing anything that doesn't want to be retrieved is often a very stressful experience that, in many cases, never ends well. This is the same case for pursuing relationships and men in general. 

First, let me be controversial by saying, it isn't a woman's place to pursue any man, simply because any man that is chased will undoubtedly run. It's not us women who need to be chasing after men - it needs to be the other way round.

For the sake of this article, I will look at a specific definition of pursuing, which means to continue or proceed along. This process, when it comes to men and dating, is very different from the general meaning, and as such, entails a series of complicated processes. Imagine yourself in a car headed to a specific destination; a destination that you chose, after shoving the chauffeur aside seconds into your ride.

This is one thing women do all the time when in a relationship, taking the reins and permitting men to date them, instead of allowing the natural dating process to unfold. This offers some form of control to some women, and also allows them to decide the kind of man they love and want. If you're that kind of woman, in love, and willing to know how to pursue the man of your dreams, I’m here to help you find the best way. Want to know how? Keep reading.

How To Pursue A Man - 10 Vital Tips

1. Be Yourself

Women who pretend to be someone they're not is one of the biggest turn-offs for men. The sad thing is, men, find it very easy to know when you're not acting yourself, no matter how hard you try to behave normally. From simple observation, men know when you're putting on a show and when you're the real version of yourself. To adequately pursue any man, do it like the woman you are, forgetting all hype that comes with behaving like someone else.

2. Be More Welcoming 

That sign across your eyes and chest that says 'don't come close'? Lose it now. Many women think they're welcoming to men when in fact, their body language tells a different story. Drop your shoulders, stop being on the offensive, and don't look too angry or strict all the time, as though you're better off living on your own. This is a huge turn-off for men who wish to pursue, primarily because of their egos. They're scared to be rejected, and that's what they believe comes with your hostile body language.

3. Don't Forget To Smile.

Be pleasant, not only on the outside but also on the inside. Smile a while; it doesn't hurt one bit, I assure you! It doesn't matter if you're a sweetheart on the inside; you love children, puppies, kittens, and charities. The very first thing people appreciate about a woman is their physical appearance. When it comes to men, they're attracted to women first because of their facial expressions and smiles. That guy in your coffee shop you've fallen in love with might be one of such men thus, smile!

4. Be A Lady 

Being a woman is easy, but being a lady can be very tough. Always be a lady, even when it gets tough and nearly impossible. Among other things, men are turned off by the use of boisterous behavior, expletives, and tacky appearances of women. They pay attention to the way you package yourself, how you talk, and address others, using these to judge you and perceive who you indeed are. Never forget this golden rule; always be a lady, and you will see all the dating magic it comes with.

5. Dress Up, But Dress Well Too.

Heed this advice when searching for a dating partner. There's a difference between the two; dressing well and dressing up. When choosing your clothes, be sure to select those that complement your body as a woman. Also, work with accessories that aren't overly flashy or extra, as these pass off a different message to onlookers. 

Just because we women have a fantastic shape and beautiful complexion doesn't mean it needs to be shown down to the tiniest detail. Be discrete as well. Allow the guy to imagine the rest before they pursue you, after showing simple snippets of your beauty. The mystery goes a long way in pursuit, so make use of it.

6. Pay Attention To How You Speak.

You can look good as a woman, with a body and clothes to die for, but when your mouth opens, everyone wishes you'd just stayed quiet. Everyone loves people who speak well. Speaking well doesn't mean you need a lot of complicated vocabulary, but rather a strong command of the English language and grammar. Being fluent with excellent command over the language is very attractive because you're perceived to be nothing short of an excellent communicator.

7. Be As Subtle As Possible.

Don't come on too strong towards the man you're pursuing, once you've decided to approach him. Always remember, being subtle is the best way to get attention and attraction. You would want to be nice, but not too sweet that you scare him off, making him think you're desperate for marriage and a family after your first phone call. It is best to be gentle enough for him to recognize that you like him and have a keen interest in him; surpassing friendship.

8. Don't Let Him In So Quickly.

Be a subtle woman, yes, but don’t be eager to bend to the will of a guy at every turn. This is what many women do a lot and is one way to turn-off men, as they love a bit of competition and adventure. Most men who pursue you will love to score with you on the first try, or after the first date, but this doesn't stand true for those looking for a more concrete and long-lasting relationship. Give him the hunt he craves and watch him pursue you like you never imagined. 

9. Offer Him Help If You Can.

It can be helping with an errand, sharing a pencil, offering some advice about work, or explaining something in detail. No matter what it might be, once you're in a position to assist, offer your help without expecting anything in return. This tells a man you're very thoughtful and genuine in your bid to help others. This is very attractive.

10. Don’t Get To The ‘Label’ Point.

Allow nothing and no situation to cause a man to label you anything negative. Labeling could stem from instances where you beg for things such as credit, phone calls, attention, time, and many others. in some extreme cases; your actions could cause a man to label you as a gold digger, which is a tough tag to get rid of.


How Do You Make Him Chase You In A Relationship?

If you're in a relationship, and you feel like he's not that interested in you, or that the love between you both has dwindled and you want it rekindles, there is some advice on how you can take as women to keep things moving again. Create and maintain a high-quality, exciting life without your other person. This often commands their attention and also builds their curiosity. Also, you need to raise your standards concerning love and judge him based on nothing but how he acts towards you.

What Is Chasing A Man?

The act of chasing or pursuing a man is the process by which women put in the effort and work in getting the attention of men they have fallen in love with. Identifying a chasing person in any relationship is very easy, by merely looking at conversations between the two parties. The person who's putting in more work than the other is pursuing the other.

How Do I Make Him Miss Me Psychology?

Making a boy you have feelings for miss you is a great thing, but don’t do too much just yet. There are simple ways to get him to miss you without being so obvious. The first is to be as independent as you can, playing it cool while looking strikingly beautiful in the process. Take something of his if possible, and leave something of yours for him to remember you by. These are great ways to get any man missing you without being too direct. 

How Do I Stay On His Mind?

Communication is one of the top ways through which you can stay on anyone's mind; thus, try your best to engage him in conversations often. Also, don't forget to dress to kill, looking irresistible, and smelling great at all times. Do subtle things that show him just how much you care, and he'll never forget you.

How Do You Make Him Miss You Like Crazy?

Make him miss you like crazy with one or all of these points! Play the waiting game with him, even though you're itching to see him, hug him, and take in a whiff of his sweater. When you're in contact, be sure to end the conversation first, such that he's left wondering why he never got to say goodbye. Lastly, always leave him craving for more, by adding a bit of mystery and surprise to your life.

To Sum It All Up

Pursuing a man shouldn’t be the norm, no matter how commanding or ‘in charge’ you feel like you need to be, there’s that person for everyone in this world thus when one man doesn't seem to want you as much as you do him, don't force it; he might probably not be the best for you. 

I hope you enjoyed this article to bits, and I do hope your friends also get to benefit from the tips and advice dropped here for you; so go ahead and this their way.  

Do you hate it how everything seems to always revolve round him while you just seem to be an afterthought sometimes?
We hear this all the time from women that contact us asking for help with their relationship.

It almost makes you wonder whether he actually likes you or whether he's just stringing you along.

Why don't you take this quick free quiz to see if he actually likes you!

April Maccario
I'm a huge nerd when it comes to understanding how relationships between men and women work, and what drives a certain behavior. I spend much of my time getting into the nitty-gritty and try to share my findings on this site with the hope of making life a little easier for women that are struggling in their relationships or love life.

One comment on “How To Pursue A Man In 10 Effective Steps”

  1. > It's not us women who need to be chasing after men - it needs to be the other way round.

    In other words, I want my cake and I want to eat it too...

    Seriously? It's 2022.

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