Do you find it a bit difficult to be yourself around guys, especially the ones you fancy?
If yes, don't worry, it happens to the best of us. Confidence is one of the most attractive attributes a woman can ever have, and the good thing about it is, you can learn it.
Overcoming this might sound like a walk in the park, but if you practice how to act cool in front of a guy, then you’ll get used to it. I know this sounds silly but turn your bathroom mirror into a guy and practice every tip I’ll share with you on him (we’re still talking about the mirror.)
Guys are very basic humans (no offense to them) but starting a conversation with a guy isn't as difficult as it may seem. Honestly, they want to be spoken to more than we do. There's no big secret behind being able to be yourself around guys other than what I'm going to share with you below, grab a seat.
How you look contributes a lot to the confidence in yourself. Dressing well will make you look attractive and give you good composure around guys. If you want to change the way they see you, then you need to feel comfortable yourself.
An outfit should make you feel like you’re free yet sassy. Plus, once you really get comfortable in the clothes you wear, it will show in the way you act around people.
”Small talk” is an art, and not everyone is good at it. Beyond the basic self-introduction, when you meet a guy, you should be able to hold a conversation. It's always nice to start with a joke or ask questions that require a lengthy conversational answer from him. Men really fancy women who are smart, so stick to subjects you are knowledgeable about.
Men are not aliens; they're humans like you and me. He's not going to bite you or smack you if you make a mistake or something.
No! The ground isn't going to open up and swallow you; so keep your composure. Don't over-analyze the situation by wondering what they're thinking about you. Just focus on having a good time with the guy you're hanging out with.
Don't be quick to think of him as a potential boyfriend or lover. Focus on establishing a friendship with him first. For all we know, he could only be good-looking, and that's not enough reason to be with anyone.
Find out what he does for a living, what he likes, what he eats, and other stuff that interests you about a guy. Ask the necessary questions and get to know him more, you’ll feel more comfortable with guys that you already know.
Lots of guys like sports. Get involved in any sport of your choice or just learn about it (everything is on google). It's a good topic for an interesting conversation. He could be into fashion, music, politics, or whatever. Just find something you are both interested in so you can talk about that. By the time you start, you'll see how much men and women have in common.
Guys like ladies who are friendly and polite. If you have these attributes, hanging out with them would be a piece of cake for you once you try it. They would be the ones talking to you and coming to visit regularly. Being a nice person isn't so hard; just treat a person the way you like to be treated in their shoes.
If you've tried to have a conversation with a guy and it seems like you are forcing it, stop. It's not worth the stress, anyone that wants to talk to you would. Listen more even though it’s a topic you know a lot about, that way, you’re observing them more to see how they relate with others.
Men also like ladies who are fun and lively. Don't be the party pooper, enjoy every moment, and involve yourself in fun activities. Don't be the girl that says no to every single offer. Sometimes, let your guard down a bit, go for that boat ride, join them to sing karaoke, learn that dance step as well. Be bubbly and active, but don't overdo it.
Keep in mind that everyone is nervous. Guys are just as anxious when they are with you, they just know how to hide it. Put up a brave front till you feel brave; that's what he's doing as well, especially if he likes you too. Nobody is perfect, if he's not going to like you because you don't know anything about sports, that's his problem.
Don't try to be someone else when you are hanging out with others; they can tell you are fake. Like I said, if he doesn't accept who you are, it's his loss. Now's not the time to worry about your big head, small feet, crooked smile, or whatever.
Those things don't matter if he likes you. If you think your nose is weird, it will feel weird and you’ll keep acting funny trying to hide those feelings.
Even though you’re feeling anxious, don’t let them see that buying is hiding behind your phone screen. Calm down and put the mirror practice to use, it’s better to participate minimally than not at all.
Sometimes, it's good to prepare yourself for a conversation. This works better with a guy you know, like coworkers, classmates, and neighbors. It’s not strange to practice having conversations. So, ask questions and answer them even though it feels strange. There’s no need to go overboard, just have an idea of the things that may be discussed.
Don't be a boring person; no one is going to want to hang with you if you act awkward. Hang out with people who are interested in the same things you are. Finding your circle is necessary, or else you will be lost and awkward all the time hanging with the wrong people. In this context, the wrong people are guys who you have nothing in common with.
You have to get out of your shell, it’s a new decade and life is short! Guys are one of the fantastic people to be friends with; once you get comfortable around them, you would enjoy their company. Step out of your comfort zone and challenge yourself; you’ve got this!
Compliments are one of the best ways to break the ice with a guy. Complimenting him would make him notice you and the conversation would flow easier as well. Don’t just blurt a random compliment; make sure it’s genuine, the effect is calming.
Whenever you are having a conversation with anyone, especially a stranger, lead it. It keeps you in control of the things you say. You need to be a little mysterious when you meet a guy, don’t tell him everything in one sitting as well, leave him intrigued by you.
A genuine smile makes you more beautiful than you already are but don’t smile too much cause that’s awkward. However, with a smile, you’d be able to breathe easier when you get nervous. Plus, when you have a smile it kind of neutralizes the environment and makes people focus more on your warm persona.
It takes more than just being yourself; you'd have to get to where you realize these guys are only humans. Talk to them like you would talk to your friends, parents, siblings, and try not to overthink the situation. Be comfortable in the way you look, trust me, it’ll take your confidence up a notch if you look good.
Maybe you’re just a shy person, or perhaps you enjoy the guys in question. It could also be that you're overanalyzing the situation (mostly this). There’s a chance you just don’t know what discussion to have with the opposite sex, and you’re trying not to embarrass yourself. Well, whatever it is, it's not worth acting awkward over.
Look them in the eyes; if that's too much for you, try focusing on something else even if you have to look at different places while they are talking. That shouldn’t stop you from listening to what they have to say, it just takes the pressure off looking directly at them.
I mean, for the first few minutes, it’s cute that you’re shy. After that, it becomes really annoying (in my opinion). However, they are men that find shy women attractive; but over time they’d want you to be confident around them because it gets tiring to deal with. Confident women are more attractive than shy women, plus shyness would take you nowhere.
Practice making small talk with the guys around you or with your mirror, like I said. Think of the guy as your friend not a potential lover. Be comfortable in your appearance when you are around him. Look him in the eye when he’s talking to you and try not to read meaning into every gesture. Pay him a genuine compliment, and control how much you say (leave room for mystery).
I know if you practice these tips, in no time, you’d be your best self around guys. It doesn't happen like magic; you have to be patient with yourself. If you enjoyed reading through this list, kindly leave your thoughts in the comment section below, and please share this article with your friends.