How To Make The First Move On A Guy (37 Ways To Make The First Move)

Last updated on June 7, 2022 by April Maccario

The days when women had to be coy, prim, and proper are far behind. The days of leaving the conversation to men and making it a male affair to initiate the first move are gone with the wind. 

However, years of conditioning have made it hard even for the 21st-century woman to make a move. That’s probably why guys you’re interested in or at least were, keep passing you by. 

Even when we determine to say something the next time, self-doubt still lifts its ugly head, coupled with the fear of rejection making women question the entire concept of starting ‘the conversation.’ Or, maybe it’s simply because most of us don’t know how to make the first move on a guy.

In a recent survey, 88% of men find it attractive when women make the first move. Did you hear that? It’s something that most guys desire and honestly won’t mind. So, if you have been pondering how to make the first move on a guy, there are 37 ways to tell him you’re interested.

37 Ways To Make The First Move

1. Dress well

Get his attention with the way you dress even before you make your move. Dress like you just stepped out of the cover page of the vanity fair. Wear clothes that accentuate your curves and expose your waist a little, so the curves are visible. In other words, look good!

Pro Tip: You can never go wrong with a high ponytail, red lipstick, and a little black dress.

2. Accessories are important

You need him to see you and remember you, so make a statement with your accessories. I know you are thinking, “how?” well, you can get a pair of chandelier earrings; they are really flashy and light up the face while bringing attention to your neckline at the same time.

So, before you make a move, make him move his eyes to your shiny piece and get his attention.

3. Get noticed

get noticed

Once your accessories and best outfits are together, it is time to get noticed. Make different moves that will make him notice you. 

An easy way to go about getting noticed is to accidentally bump against him on your way to the coffee shop.

4. Be yourself 

Don’t ever change yourself for a guy. You are attractive and beautiful both on the inside and outside. Do not try to reduce yourself to fit into his box. So be unapologetically you and know your worth.

5. Be bold

Most girls will rather eat raw peppers than make the first move on a guy they find attractive. They make sure they wait for someone else to do the chasing, and sometimes, that person isn’t always the one they desire. 

6. Buy him a drink

“Can I buy you a drink?” is the oldest page in the book of classic moves. So pull a classic and watch events turn in your favor. Make sure you have the cash to back your preposition up.

It works like a charm and kind of gives the guy a hint to what you want from him.

7. Watch out for the signs

This is important, so you don’t waste your time making moves on a guy that does not feel the same way (or does not want that kind of attention from you). You can always tell from the signs. People give off signs when they are uncomfortable, irritated, or not just interested.

8. Take note of his body language

Only 7% of our daily communication is verbal; 55% comes from body language. Body language tells a lot about how a person feels. If he leans back while you are talking and in your company, he feels relaxed. If he leans forward, he is interested in what you have to say. Make sure you note these simple body movements, it will do a lot for your love life.

Also, find ways to decode his intentions with his body language. 

9. Use your body language

How do you use your body to let someone else know you’re interested? How does that work? I’ll tell you. Remember that communication is bidirectional. So show that you are having a good time with him by using slight body motions. Mirror his expressions and laugh subtly while making conversation. 

10. Spend more time with him

What do you do when you don’t know how to make the first move on a guy? You spend time with him and expect a miracle right? Not really. Quality time is necessary when you are trying to make a move, it simply helps you build confidence and get comfortable. 

Plus, it’s also one way of making him comfortable around you, and he’ll think you value spending time with him as well. 

11. Smile

When you smile more, you seem more relatable and not so stuck up and boring, and that, to me, is a win. If he makes a joke, remember to laugh even if it’s not that funny. Let him know you’re finding his sense of humor intriguing and give him something to smile about as well.

12. Eye contact

Now you understand the importance of smiling and how it makes you less stuck up and shows your beautiful facial features, maintain eye contact for like 4-5 seconds. The eye is the window to the soul, so use it!

13. Play it cool

He may really like you, but has a hard time communicating his actual feelings because he is shy. So don’t do something that will make him uncomfortable, just keep things nice and casual. 

14. Converse with him a lot

converse with him a lot

Talking will help you get to know him better, so talk to him a lot. That way, you get to know more about him and get his views on certain things. Try asking open-ended questions like “where did you grow up?” it helps him open up more.

Frustrated that he doesn't pay you as much attention as he used to?
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It makes you wonder whether he actually likes you or not.

Take this free quiz to see if he actually likes you!

15. Ask if he is in a relationship

You don’t want to ask a guy out, then later find out he is in a relationship. So, ask first before making your feelings known. You need to be as direct as possible when asking about this because men can be very funny or might want to juggle more than one ball at a time.

“Are you in a relationship with anyone?” “Is anyone in a relationship with you” “will I have my wig pulled out and get beaten for hanging out with you?” These are all valid questions, you need to ask!

16. Be credible

Honesty goes a long way, so let your yes be your yes, and your no be your no. So even with the laughs and light banter, ensure you are credible.

17. Damsel in distress

It boosts men's egos when you ask them for help. They feel good about themselves, and when you make him feel good, he just naturally draws to you.

18. Compliment him a lot

Men love hearing compliments, they love it even more when it comes from women. Once you compliment them, they become more comfortable around you, and this will make it way easier to ask him out.

You don’t believe me? Here is a piece talking about how compliments got different men eating from the palm of their women.

19. Don’t make it too apparent

Do not make it too apparent that you have feelings for him or are attracted to him so he doesn’t take you for granted. You are a catch, and you are not desperate; always remember this.

20. Positivity

Being positive makes you interesting and immediately gives you a brighter facial expression. While negativity makes you all gloomy, so emit positivity and keep things intriguing and happy.

21. Initiate dates

A direct “Will you go on a date with me?” or “My roommate was supposed to see a movie with me tomorrow, but she has to prepare for an impromptu test” will suffice. 

22. Call for backup

If he is not budging and doesn’t want to agree to the date, it’s time to consult your friends. 

You never can tell; they might come up with one idea that helps you get the guy.

23. Go on a date

Consider going to a place where you will both enjoy and be happy. If you both enjoy going to the movies, then you should go and see one. 

24. Check up on him after the date

Don’t you just like it when a guy checks up on you after a date? You feel special, loved, and you immediately assume he enjoyed your company, yes? Well, extend that same energy to him.

25. Buy ‘just because’ gifts

You buy ‘just because’ when something reminds you of the person and you know it will mean so much to them. Men feel special when they receive gifts. So, it might just be one way to win his heart.

26. Take interests in the things he does

Learn about what he likes and try to get involved, maybe attend one activity that won’t interfere with your daily routine. He will feel cherished when you take interest in the things he does.

27. You are the catch

The fact that this guy did not walk up to you first or isn’t making the first move does not mean you no longer have the juice. He might just be shy and nervous. So, still remember you are the catch and act like you are the best thing to ever happen to him because you honestly are.

28. Say his name a lot

Saying this guy’s name will imply that he is important to you, and you see him on a more personal level. It will make him feel more comfortable with you, you could even give him a nickname.

29. Flirt with him

flirt with him

Flirting makes you feel good and when you feel good, you attract people easily. It’s time to tease this guy, flood his thoughts with images of you and occupy his mind by using supple actions. 

30. Make good use of social media 

Do your homework on him, know his schedule, his friends and check out what he likes by going through posts he liked in the past.

31. Sign up for the same activities

Now that his Facebook says he works out at a gym close to your location, mistakenly enroll at the same gym with him.

32. Break the barriers

When you touch him (after asking him if it’s okay of course, because consent is important), a hormone called oxytocin is released. Oxytocin is called the ‘cuddle hormone,’ and it makes him feel relaxed and seen. 

33. Befriend his friends

Being in the same social circle will increase the probability of spending more time with him and getting to know him better. You will get to see him in his relaxed form and talk to him better.

34. Tell the guy how you feel

The best way to go about this is to be as direct as possible. Let him know exactly how you feel about him. If during the conversation, there are signs of mutual interest, then go ahead and tell him how you feel.

35. State the terms

Let him know if you want a relationship or you simply want to date casually. Talk about exclusivity and be clear on what you want from him. 

36. Take it slow

While making the first move on this guy, he might feel like you are on a different pace than him, that’s why it’s important to be on the same page so as not to come off as too controlling.

37. The big intimate step

Always ask for permission before you take the first big intimate step sexually. State what you want and ask if the guy is okay with your actions. Don’t ask for permission while you are both drunk as it’s important to both be in a state that ensures cohesive decision-making. 


Do guys like it when you make the first move?

When you make the first move, men will see you as confident. You see what you want, and you go for it, and that is an attribute all men want. So don’t be afraid that men don’t like it, you are not too forward.

How do I make the first move on a guy through text?

It is important to know if he also likes you or feels the same way. So when you text, be direct as possible. Explain exactly how you feel and let him know what you want.

What does it mean when a guy makes the first move?

It means he fancies you and finds you attractive. It also kind of gives you a perspective into the guy's life; that he is a goal-getter, and he is confident too.

How do guys like to be kissed?

Guys prefer to be kissed on the lips, jaw, and cheeks as well. This is after you have obtained permission to do so, and you are both in a mental state to make cohesive civil decisions.

Do guys like it when girls text first?

Yes, they do. When you text first, you come across as bold, and guys are attracted to bold women; they find them thrilling.

In Conclusion

When making the first move, ensure you don’t pressure the guy as you may come off as desperate, and no man wants a desperate woman. I hope you enjoyed reading every part of this article. Let me know what you think in the comment section and share this if you enjoyed reading the article.

Do you hate it how everything seems to always revolve round him while you just seem to be an afterthought sometimes?
We hear this all the time from women that contact us asking for help with their relationship.

It almost makes you wonder whether he actually likes you or whether he's just stringing you along.

Why don't you take this quick free quiz to see if he actually likes you!

April Maccario
I'm a huge nerd when it comes to understanding how relationships between men and women work, and what drives a certain behavior. I spend much of my time getting into the nitty-gritty and try to share my findings on this site with the hope of making life a little easier for women that are struggling in their relationships or love life.

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