How To Anonymously Tell Someone Their Spouse Is Cheating (6 Ways)

by April Maccario

If you're reading this article, the chances are that you either suspect a cheating partner or you have caught someone cheating and you feel compelled to tell their spouse. But the weight of knowing the truth is one thing, and the best way to reveal the truth is another thing - that is, if you should even reveal it at all. 

There are so many things to take into consideration when you suspect a spouse is cheating. So much so that sometimes you'll wish you didn't even know the truth (or, at least, have those suspicions). You'll have to consider your relationship with the victim and how they'll be able to digest the information. You'll also consider how the details will affect them. 

Ask yourself, can they handle it? Will they even believe you? Many questions will swim in and out of your mind that you'll wonder whether it is best to just keep your mouth shut or anonymously report. Be careful, though, because anonymous cheating reporting is sometimes accompanied by some risks to the reporter if not done properly. 

So, this article will show you ways to anonymously tell on an unfaithful spouse while staying clear from danger.

Are You Certain? Be 100% Sure Of It!

Before you do anything, you have to be one hundred percent sure that this person is a cheater. What you don’t want to do is jump to conclusions without any concrete evidence. This is absolutely crucial. If you’re not sure about your suspicions, you could risk causing damage to your friend’s marriage or relationship for almost no reason at all.

Now, this is where it could get a bit tricky - you'll have to put on your private detective hat and do some digging. This will require stalking when necessary - hey, anything for a friend, right? For a successful anonymous cheater report, pay attention to where the cheater goes, if he goes with someone and what time. 

You can even ask him friendly questions, all aimed at extracting details without sounding suspicious. During this stage of information gathering, you may want to act as a lone ranger - at least, until you're certain about your findings. This way, if your suspicions are proven unfounded, you won't be embarrassed. 

If you can afford it, you can also hire the services of a private investigator. At this point, you'll have to decide if it is worth it or not. And this decision will be based on how much you value this person you suspect is being cheated on. 

So, you have been able to confirm your suspicions, congratulations (or not - depending on how you feel about it). Now is the challenging part - how to tell his wife anonymously. But wait. Do you even have to? Are you obliged to tell, because telling the truth hurts? You may not be obliged to report on a cheating spouse, but no responsible person will stand aside and watch without doing anything while someone continues cheating on his spouse. 

Now let's talk about how to tell someone their spouse is cheating - without being identified.

1. Email

One of the best ways to anonymously tell someone about a cheating spouse is to do it through an email. There are currently countless email service providers to choose from. All you need to do is to register a new account solely for the purpose of sending your message. You must be careful, though, not to use any correct details about yourself when doing the registration. 

You do not want to leave any sort of trace that will lead back to you. Be creative with the type of name you use to register this email account. And make sure that the name you choose is as far from you as it is possible. Now to the email content - you do not want to waste time beating about the bush. The chances are that your target recipient will not even bother reading the entire mail. 

So, go straight to the point with your message. And, in doing so, do your best not to reveal anything about yourself through your style of writing. For example, if there are certain affectionate nicknames you use, avoid them. Be direct when writing about the cheater in your mail. And if you have any file (pictures, videos, etc.) to back your claim, attach them to the email. Evidence is everything.

2. Place a phone call

One other way to anonymously tell someone about a cheating spouse is through a phone call. But you need to do this without leaving a trace about your identity. Did you know that your phone number comes with your personal identity attached to it? This makes it very easy to track and trace a call to the caller's identity and location. 

To be safe, take advantage of a burner service when making your phone call. A burner service will offer you a private number that comes with an entirely different and untraceable identity that you can use to call the spouse of the cheater. This way, you will not have to worry about being found out and, worse of all, being hunted down by the cheater. 

Another very important feature that a burner service will offer you is the ability to change your voice to any type of voice you want. This feature is strongly recommended as you do not want to be found out. Voices alone can be relatively easy to make out, especially when the listener knows how you sound. 

Now, when reporting the cheater, go straight to the point. Too much unnecessary talk may lead to unknowingly revealing information about yourself. When talking, be clear, friendly, and polite. The only disadvantage here is that you will not be able to show physical evidence over a phone call. But you can direct the listener to where she can find it.

3. Social media

Using social media is one of the best ways to anonymously tell someone about an unfaithful boyfriend. Almost everyone has one social media account or another, with the most popular ones being Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter. You can take advantage of such platforms to achieve your goal without being found out. 

All you need to do is to set up a fake account on any of these online platforms. Be sure that the person you intend to send the information to is also registered on the same platform. 

When setting up your account, make sure that it is believable enough. That is to say, make sure that it looks as real as possible. Otherwise, the chances are that the recipient will not take you seriously, and might actually block or report you. 

Once you're done creating the 'fake' account, send the person a friend request or follow their account depending on what the platform requires. Then send your message about everything you've seen or heard concerning their cheating husband or boyfriend. Again, be precise, straight to the point, polite, and avoid beating about the bush. Attach your evidence if you have them. 

Before sending your message, be sure to turn the location off your device to avoid leaving a trace. Do not send requests to any family member or friend.

4. Use a letter

Yet another effective way to anonymously tell someone about a cheating spouse is through the good old paper letter. This may be the oldest trick on the list. But it is still very effective if done properly. 

Unlike in past times, when an anonymous letter about cheating spouse was handwritten, you have to type it this time around. This will prevent either the victim or the cheater from identifying you through your handwriting. When typing out the information you have, be sure to avoid stating unnecessary details. 

You have to be sensitive to the fact that this information may come as a huge blow to the victim and may not necessarily want to know all the details. Let your message be direct and straight to the point. Sound like a friend - like someone who cares even though you're pretending to be someone else. State the facts about what you know - without giving your own interpretations or conclusion.

Do not try to tell the victim what to do about the situation. Let them decide that. Do not send a copy to any other person - not even a family member. And, very importantly, apologize for the pain that your message may cause the victim and her relationship.

5. Tell a friend

young gossip girl whisper to her friend's ear.

One of the most difficult options available to you (when it comes to how to anonymously tell someone about a cheating husband) is telling someone else. And who better to tell than a trusted friend? This process is not as simple or straightforward as sending a message about the cheater. You will battle with your mind over whether it is safe or not to tell someone else aside from the partner of the cheater. 

This is because, aside from wondering if this friend will believe you, you will wonder about what they think your motive is and how this will even affect your relationship with this friend. 

So, do you go ahead and tell your friend? Before you tell other people or someone else about the cheater, you need to be sure that you can trust those people. 

If you have the slightest doubt in your mind concerning that other someone, then it's better not to tell. Once you are able to clear the doubt hurdle, speak to this someone in all confidentiality. Be careful not to come out as reporting the cheater or trying to end their relationship. Instead, let your voice and your message show the genuine concern you are already feeling. 

Telling a friend or someone you trust about your finding will not only relieve you of the burden but will also prevent you from being branded as secretive when the truth finally comes out.

6. Tell a family member

Someone else to consider, when it comes to telling other people, is a family member. Notice the focus is on a single family member - not the whole family. Again, this should be someone you trust - someone who will understand and appreciate your concern without spreading the message to other people. 

Also, if you want to tell a family member, then be sure you are close to this family member or at least have some form of a good relationship with this person. This will prevent them from misjudging your intentions or even disregarding the confidentiality of the message. 

Again, be careful not to come out as reporting the cheater. Rather, tell your story with genuine concern and apologize for any harm the revelation may cause.

FAQs

Should you tell a friend if their spouse is cheating?

As difficult as it may be, you owe it to your friend as a moral duty to tell her if their spouse is cheating. How to expose a cheater (whether anonymously or openly) is another thing. Do not ever feel that the act of exposing the truth about someone else's spouse is wrong. 

Should I tell someone their husband is cheating on them?

Yes, you should. But you will have to provide evidence to back your message. Depending on the risks involved, you may also have to consider revealing the truth anonymously, especially if you are not very close to the person.

How do you tell someone you know they are cheating?

Sometimes, you will need to convey the message directly to the cheater that you're aware of their actions. Whether you will do so directly or anonymously depends on how well you know them. If you are too scared of a direct confrontation, then send your message anonymously. You can use any of the ways mentioned in this article.

Would you know if your partner is cheating?

If you know your partner well enough, you should know if they are cheating. There are so many signs to look out for or pay attention to. Most of these signs will bring about a change in character towards you. For example, when your partner begins to spend less time with you and prefers staying out late. That should confer a message.

What to do if the wife is cheating?

Try to find out why. People cheat for a reason. Avoid blaming yourself, your wife, or the third party she's cheating with as that will not solve anything. Speak to someone you trust about it. It could be a family member or a close friend. But do not resort to talking to people you do not know or whose opinion you cannot trust. Try not to wallow in self-pity or play the victim card. Instead, work on your own shortcomings.

On A Final Note

So, how do you tell someone their spouse is cheating without revealing your identity? The different ways offered in this article should help convey your message to that someone anonymously. Following these simple tips would keep you safe from any possible danger of being found out. 

Feel free to share your thoughts about this article in the comment section. And, please share the article if you enjoyed reading it.

April Maccario
I'm a huge nerd when it comes to understanding how relationships between men and women work, and what drives a certain behavior. I spend much of my time getting into the nitty-gritty and try to share my findings on this site with the hope of making life a little easier for women that are struggling in their relationships or love life.

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