Do Men Get Emotionally Attached After Having Sex? (13 Ways Sex Affects Men Emotionally)

Last updated on October 24, 2022 by April Maccario

Women often conclude that sex is purely physical for men. This is because they seem to be very good at isolating their feelings from the act itself. They’re accustomed to acting out of lust instead of love. 

So, do men get emotionally attached after sex? The answer is maybe. Sex does have an impact on a man's emotions, some men don't even know this. It's very possible for a man to catch feelings for you even if you aren’t in a relationship with him.

Apart from the fact that most men have confessed to physically feeling great during and after sex, they also derive emotional satisfaction from the act. 

The challenge here is that most men don't specifically know what emotional needs are being met during sex. This may be a problem in their relationships, since expressing these emotions only in action can make sex addictive. Their appetite could slowly tire out their partners and ruin their relationship.

 If you're still somehow in doubt of your partner's ability to feel emotion during intercourse, here are a few ways sex can affect a man emotionally.

13 Ways Sex Affects Men Emotionally

1. It can make them irrational

On the rare occasion where a man's emotions are triggered after sex, they may begin to act irrationally. The idea that men approach life from the standpoint of reason and logic is not a myth. Unlike their female counterparts, they are more interested in a ‘problem meets solution’ approach, it's hard to find a man who’s interested in something just for the sake of appreciating its existence. 

Even the way men approach art (meant for appreciation) is based on rationale. Women can buy art just because it's beautiful or it holds emotional value, however, most men buy art for the investment opportunities it provides. During sex, most men are able to let down their emotional guard and silence their rational minds.

2. They leave behind their logic

Much like rationality, logic truly is man's best companion. By nature, they tend to see things from a more logical point of view. If it doesn't 'make sense' to them, they don't see the need to engage mentally or otherwise. 

However, sometimes, if a guy has a sexual connection, he drops all logic. He may start to follow you around for the day, not caring how it affects his time. Even if he’s not in a relationship with you, he may sit through a romantic movie with you, despite how boring it may seem for him.

3. It makes him feel close and connected in his relationship

It's not completely true that sex is just an activity for a man, sometimes sex does play an emotional role in a man's life. What men don't often mention is that sex is one of the few ways they are able to fully connect with their partners. 

Contrary to popular opinion, men value connection and enjoy it too. Even when they are having casual sex, they still seek some kind of connection. Men don't really have other means of connecting, unlike women who are able to have deep connections with people and things in multiple ways. 

A woman can bond with you just by having a conversation or physical contact like a hug. Men find it harder to truly connect with people in these ways, mostly because they don't necessarily enjoy talking or hugging as much as women do.

4. He's able to express his emotions in the privacy and intimacy of sex

Society has made us believe that men aren't supposed to express their emotions. They're taught to be stoic and to avoid showing any feelings that would make them seem weak. 

Lots of men find sex to be a safe space for them to release and express these emotions. Since most intimate acts are carried out in privacy and within the confines of a secure relationship; they aren't as reluctant to let loose. Sex provides this opportunity for them to express their pent-up emotional energy.

5. He can be vulnerable

Sex is probably one of the only ways a man can allow himself to be vulnerable. Sexual acts most times provide men with a physical and emotional cushion and give them an opportunity to let loose. Sex makes them feel accepted and somewhat understood. It takes him back to his childhood (emotionally not necessarily mentally), to a time when he was allowed to be dependent. 

Society sometimes forgets that both men and women are human, men need to be vulnerable too. Instead, we place more emphasis on the need for a man to be strong and infallible. This is not realistic at all, no one should feel like they constantly have to be in control of things. This is why most men find release and surrender during intercourse. 

6. It gives them a transcendental feeling

it gives them a transcendental feeling

Similar to vulnerability, sex provides men with an escape from ego. Good sex is said to feel almost spiritual, both for men and women. It has the ability to take a person beyond their conscious mind for a moment, freeing them from their egos and making them aware of a different version of themselves.

These transcendental, intense feelings make them feel hopeful and convince them (at least in that moment) that there's more to life than their mundane, daily tasks.

7. It softens their tough male defenses

Thanks to society's expectations of a man, most of them have learned to build strong defenses against so much. This is one reason they do not allow themselves to express emotion most of the time. 

During intercourse, these walls and defense systems are softened and they're able to let themselves connect with their partner, limitlessly. At that point, they are able to rise above the expectations placed on them by culture and society. 

8. He thinks reliability, support, and partnership

Though this does not happen very often, it is quite normal. Men do think of continuity after a sexual encounter, it's not ‘just sex’ for them all the time. Women are not alone in this, even though men are better at separating sexual desire from their emotions and feelings, they still sometimes get attached to their one-night stand or a booty call. 

It's very possible for a man to have sex with a woman he feels nothing for, sometimes even a woman he despises. Unlike women who prefer to have sex with a man she feels something for. This ability to be indifferent about their feelings during or after sex, is what makes them seem as if they can’t get emotionally attached.

However, some men have confessed that they’ve been tempted to ask their one-night stand to sleep over. Not just for another round, but to enjoy a similitude of romantic love. However, men are afraid of seeming weak; they don't like to feel rejected so they hardly ever ask.

9. They cry too

I bet we've all heard of postcoital dysphoria (PCD) at least once or twice. The act of crying during or after intercourse has been a mystery for so long. In recent years, however, psychologists and relationship therapists have discovered that PCD is more common than people like to admit. 

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Postcoital dysphoria is not just common, it's quite natural according to experts. People often attribute this act to women alone; this is far from true. Some men are extremely emotionally moved during intercourse, even to the point of tears. 

Some people feel that it is taboo for a man to cry, but just like every other emotionally evolved being, crying is normal for men. Much like shedding tears of joy when something extraordinarily good happens, some men are extremely emotional during sex. Some may even catch feelings because of this.

10. It triggers introspection

Most times, men fall asleep immediately after sex, this is because the body releases serotonin after ejaculation. Serotonin is a hormone responsible for not just pleasant feelings but relaxation too; It helps to soothe the mind. This is why most men dose off after sex.

However, they don’t always turn around and fall asleep immediately. When they're with a partner who knows exactly how to fulfill their sexual desires, they could find themselves reflecting on their lives; past, present, or future, afterward. 

The transcendental experience a man gets during sex, can make him rethink decisions, regret past mistakes or even wonder about his future. It may even make them form a stronger emotional attachment with their partner.

11. He may feel the need to distance himself

Men don't always express their emotions the same way we do. Most times when a woman is deep in her feelings, she prefers to be around a friend, parent, sibling, or partner. For men, this is hardly ever the case. 

Lots of men love to isolate themselves when they're emotional which is probably why some men prefer not to talk after sex. For some men, it's extreme. They may not even want to cuddle. They roll over and either sleep off or withdraw into their own mental space after sexual activity. Most women think this means that their partners aren’t emotionally attracted to them, but it may not always be the case. He may be feeling way too emotional to engage you.

12. They are more likely to get addicted

they are more likely to get addicted

Sex most definitely provides a medium for men to experience emotional satisfaction. Yet most men don't even know that they’re getting emotionally involved. They aren't very verbal or expressive beings so it's even harder for them to discover what needs their sexual activity fulfills. 

Just like narcotics, sex can become addictive, especially in the case where it serves as an escape. Without realizing and acknowledging the roles sexual intimacy plays in fulfilling emotional needs, he's at risk of getting lost in the satisfaction of it without fully understanding what he's gaining from it. His emotions are continuously expressed only in action and never verbalized, making his need for continuous gratification insatiable.

13. It lifts their spirits

Finally, intercourse makes a man feel a sense of happiness, peace, and satisfaction. Even men who aren’t in committed relationships admit that they feel good after a good round. This is why some women take advantage of this state to ask for things from their partners. Guys fall into this trap more often than they’d like to admit. 

They're so high in spirit that they can agree to things they wouldn't normally agree to. Some men have confessed that even food tastes better after intercourse. This can all be credited to the release of dopamine and serotonin- our happy hormones. During sex, a significant amount of these hormones are released, lightening their moods and making the world seem like a better place in that moment. 


What do men feel after sex?

A majority of men have reported that they feel, irritable, distant, and sometimes a bit blue after sex. However, the other half of the male population claims that they feel great afterward. They claim to feel less stressed, light, and satisfied. They express this in different ways, some may go off to have a snack or some may fall asleep.

What does sex mean to a man?

Sex is primarily a physical act that helps them release sexual energy. However, it doesn't just stop at that; intercourse also helps a man feel needed and emotionally attached to his partner. He feels able to provide some form of physical and emotional support, this makes him feel like a hero to some extent.

Does sex make you fall in love?

This all depends on the parties involved, some people cannot imagine having intercourse with a person they don't feel emotionally attached to. While others discover an emotional attraction only if they're satisfied sexually. However, in a general sense, sex on its own cannot make a person fall in love. They may feel an emotional connection but it would likely be based on lust. 

Why do men sleep after sex?

A hormone called serotonin, which is responsible for happiness and relaxation, is released after an orgasm. This hormone coupled with the oxytocin hormone gives men a calming, soothing feeling after intercourse. This is what makes him fall asleep; it doesn't always mean that there’s no true intimacy between you both. 

What do men feel during sex?

Intercourse is generally quite pleasurable for men, unlike women who don't necessarily enjoy sexual activity every single time. Apart from physical feelings, sometimes men also experience feelings of safety and satisfaction. Sometimes there are feelings of excitement and clarity, but some men have confessed that they also get emotionally engaged during intercourse.

In Conclusion

I hope you found this article interesting. Remember, men aren't robots, sex also affects their emotions in one way or the other. Please let me know what you think about this topic in the comment section below and be sure to share the article with friends or on your social media. 

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April Maccario
I'm a huge nerd when it comes to understanding how relationships between men and women work, and what drives a certain behavior. I spend much of my time getting into the nitty-gritty and try to share my findings on this site with the hope of making life a little easier for women that are struggling in their relationships or love life.

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