Boyfriend Tells Me What To Wear (3 Reasons Why & What To About It)

Last updated on July 4, 2022 by April Maccario

Does your partner ever discourage you from wearing certain outfits? Or perhaps he’s telling you what you can or can’t dress like all the time? 

It’s certainly emotionally tough when your partner is telling you what you should look like and which clothes you should be wearing, and it’s confusing to get to the bottom of why they’re trying to control you in this way.

However, there’s no need to be confused and upset anymore, because, in this article, we’re going to tell you the reasons why your boyfriend is telling you what to wear, and what you need to do about it. So, let's get into it.

3 Reasons Why Your Boyfriend Tells You What To Wear

1. He’s controlling

If your partner is telling you what to wear all the time, it’s definitely a red flag that he’s trying to control you. Obviously, if your partner tells you that he doesn’t like your outfit very irregularly, such as once or twice, then maybe he just simply doesn’t love your new dress or the top you’ve just bought. However, if your boyfriend is telling you which clothes you should and shouldn’t wear, or says that you’re not allowed to wear certain clothes, he’s most likely controlling you.

If your partner shows other signs of control, such as being manipulative, selfish, not letting you see your friends or family and abusive towards you, it’s most likely that you’re in a controlling relationship.

2. He’s jealous

hes jealous

A reason why your partner might be telling you what to wear is because they’re a jealous person, and therefore they don’t want other people to see you looking good. You’ll be able to tell if this is the reason because when you want to wear something that shows a bit of skin or dress a little more risque, that’s when they will tell you that they don’t appreciate what you’re wearing and try to control it. 

They will be trying to control the way you look because they struggle with their own insecurity and low self-esteem, so instead of actually spending time to deal with their own issues, they force you to change because they’re too jealous to cope.

3. He doesn’t love your fashion sense

If your partner is telling you what to wear or suggesting a certain thing for you to wear, they’re doing so because they’re either jealous or controlling, or both. However, they may be doing so because they don’t like your fashion sense. 

If your partner is very fashion-conscious, they might want you to dress in a way that suits their style. However, this still doesn’t make it acceptable for them to be telling you what you should look like all the time. A partner should love you for who you are, regardless of which clothes you have.

What Should You Do About It

1. Ask your partner why they’re telling you how to dress

The only way you’re actually going to find out why your partner tells you how you should dress is by speaking to them. If you feel confident and comfortable enough to do so, you should have a serious conversation with your partner about why they’re trying to control the way you look. 

When you confront them, make sure you’re in a safe environment so that if your partner gets aggressive towards you, you’re protected and you can leave the situation without being harmed.

2. Realize that you are your own person

realize that you are your own person

Regardless of what reason your partner has for the way they act, you need to understand and realize that you are your own person. You are the only one that should be deciding what you look like, and your partner shouldn’t have any input. 

Although this sounds as it’s a simple thing to realize, if your partner has been manipulating you for a while, you might find it difficult to see yourself as a worthy, independent individual. However, you must realize that you can wear what you want, do what you want, and say what you want. 

3. Make him accept your independence or leave

There are only two options in this situation - either your partner accepts your independence and doesn’t interfere with your wardrobe again, or you leave him. If your partner is controlling and overly jealous, it’s probably best for you to leave him, as the partnership will most likely be toxic and unhealthy.

However, if your partner has been conscious about your fashion sense and has been trying to help you dress differently in a misguided manner, and they promise to never do it again moving forward, you might want to stick around for a bit longer.

Overall, you should never be with someone that tells you what to do and doesn’t respect your own independence and individuality.

FAQs

Is it okay for your boyfriend to tell you what to wear?

You are your own person and therefore you have the right to choose which clothes you get to dress in. So, it’s absolutely not acceptable for your partner to say what you should wear. If your partner is suggesting that you try another style or saying that he’d love to see you in a certain piece of clothing, this is fine, as long as he doesn’t push something on you. However, if he’s actually telling you what you can and can’t wear, it’s unacceptable.

Why does my boyfriend not let me wear certain clothes?

Your partner might not be letting you wear certain clothes because he’s either jealous, controlling, or doesn't get your fashion sense. Of course, there might be other more specific reasons, but typically one of these will be the reason. You should ask your partner why he doesn’t like you wearing certain clothes because he’s the only one that actually knows his reason for it.

What are the signs of a controlling boyfriend?

If your partner is telling you what to wear, what to do, who to see, and what to think, he’s most likely controlling you! In addition, if your partner treats you as if you’re less important than him, if he’s selfish, if he’s taking you away from your family or friends, and if he makes you feel as if you’re always walking on eggshells, he’s most definitely controlling and your relationship with him isn’t healthy.

Should a man tell a woman what to wear?

A man should never tell a woman what to wear, as you’ve probably already found out by reading this article so far. You are your own person and you can decide exactly what you want to wear and what you don’t want to wear. If someone tells you what to wear, they’re trying to control you, and this isn’t something that should happen in a healthy partnership.

What is a toxic relationship?

A toxic relationship is an unhealthy relationship between two people, typically where one person is manipulative, jealous, and emotionally or physically abusive towards the other, resulting in an unfair, harmful relationship.

In Conclusion

Hopefully, after reading this article you understand why your partner is telling you what to wear, why it’s absolutely not acceptable for him to do that and how you should deal with the situation. Remember, you can wear whatever you want to wear, because you are your own person, and no one should control you!

Did you enjoy this article and find it useful? Let us know in the comments and feel free to share with anyone you think needs to read it.

Do you hate it how everything seems to always revolve round him while you just seem to be an afterthought sometimes?
We hear this all the time from women that contact us asking for help with their relationship.

The thing is that which causes men to behave this way is actually something how men are wired. Once you understand how this works, it's relatively easy to change with a few subtle things you can say to him today.

My friend uploaded a quick video which you can watch here (click on the link to watch) where he explains how you can turn this behavior around!

April Maccario
I'm a huge nerd when it comes to understanding how relationships between men and women work, and what drives a certain behavior. I spend much of my time getting into the nitty-gritty and try to share my findings on this site with the hope of making life a little easier for women that are struggling in their relationships or love life.

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